"Embracing Solitude: Finding Contentment in Singleness" (How to be content in your singleness)

There was a time during my singleness where I was frustrated. I desired marriage and I would often

ask God "When will it be my turn"?

I was around the age of 24 and I desired marriage. This was tough time for me. I was still trying to recover from heartbreak and trying to find myself. I thought I was ready for marriage at this time. I struggled in my singleness and it really hurt. I finally got to the point where I was tired of feeling like I was not good enough and I was tired of feeling broken. I wanted better and better is what I got.

How to be content in your singleness as a Christian woman

1. Admit that you are not content being single if you are not content

You cannot work on something when you are not honest with yourself. You have to admit that you are not satisfied in your current state.

2. Think about how being content in your singleness will change your life.

Everyone is different. No two people will want the same thing. Think about how being content in your singleness will change your life. I know for me it took the worrisome and frustration about not being married before 30 away. I wanted to be married before the age of 30. As a matter of fact I wanted to be married by age 25 and have 2 children by age 28. It did not happen that way. I got married at the age of 31. Being content in my singleness for me took my mind off my timeline for marriage and children. I was able to go with the flow.

3. Work on you and change your mindset

Living in a world that is so focused on sex can be a challenge sometimes. I am a Christian woman who was abstinent until marriage and there was times I wanted to not remain abstinent. When you are secure in who you are (which I wasn't at one point) I questioned my self value while in my singleness. I thought being single was the worst thing ever. Honestly being single is not the worse thing. I know you may have heard that your singleness is a blessing. It really is. I would not say this if it wasn't true. This is the time to become the best version. Listen to me carefully. Change your mindset if you are at the point of struggling in your singleness.

The is a transparent moment: When I began to focus on self work, I realized I was not ready for marriage. I was so grateful I did not get married at the age of 24. I was not mature. I probably would have been divorced by 28 because I was so immature when it came to marriage. I did a lot of self sabotaging at that time. I did not know how to love myself and I did not know my self value. I was a struggling virgin. I had to learn how to love me versus looking to someone to give me the love I desired.

I began to focus on me and I became a better person. I was able to prepare for marriage instead of allowing the idea of marriage to control me. Ask God to work on your heart and change your mindset. A transformations needs to happen.

4. Ask God to show you your purpose and walk in it

I found that when my mind was idle my thoughts would go wild. There have been times I thought I was not good enough because I was single for so long. The saying "an idle mind is the devil's workshop" is so true. However, when you focus on your purpose you won't have as much time for your thought to go wild. I'm not saying you won't have some wild thoughts, but I am saying it will be much less than before.

Walking in your purpose keeps you busy. You will be "minding your business". What do I mean when I say "minding your business"? You are doing what you are supposed to be doing. Meaning you are doing what God has called you to do. While frustrated in my singleness I had no clue what my purpose was. I was so focused on the idea of marriage I did not have the time to prioritize focusing on my purpose.

Once I started on my path of purpose, time flew by so fast. Next thing I knew I was getting married.

5. Stop trying to control what you cannot control

Once you realize God is in control you will stop trying to take control of the narrative. You have a responsibility to do your part. However at the end of the day God is in control of everything. Control what you can and stop trying to control what you cannot. Take the time to enjoy this time. Put your faith to work with action. Do not worry about your timeline for marriage. Live life and have fun while doing it. As stated before walk in your purpose, do your part, and trust God for the rest.

These tips helped me to be content while I was in my singleness. Let me know in the comments if you apply any of these tips to your singleness.

Click here for more support during your singleness while preparing and positioning for marriage.